Bedroom for 2 Sweet Girls

After several weeks, today, the last day I'm in the US, we finally finished Joy & Kya's room.

Leave behind such childish faith!

Leave behind such childish faith? No! It's the other way around....

"Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." And he took the children in his arms, placed his hands on them and blessed them." Mark 10:15, 16 NIV

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." - Philippians 4:6 NIV

And here, in her childlike faith, she pleads & begs of her Lord to bring her sister, Joy, home and bring her home 'soon'.

So many first

With our sweet babies, we love to see all their 'first'
(first roll over, first words and so on).

With an adoption there are so many first also, even with an older child.
I am longing to experience all my first with Joy.

The first time I see her face in person instead of pictures.
The first time I touch her.
The first hug.
The first meal together, first ice cream, first bath,
The first time I pray with her, put her to bed and kiss her goodnight.
The first time I wake up in the morning and she is there.
First time stepping off the airplane and seeing her family,
First night home, first time she sits down at our dining room table with our family,
The first time we take her to Church with us,
...and so many more first that happen when a child steps into our family.

I look forward to each of them.

Here is the 'first' video of Joy answering questions. This was taken last summer.

Wishing Joy a very happy birthday

Today Joy turned 9 years old. While we were not together to celebrate as a family, we have had constant thoughts of Joy. Holding to the truth that this is her last birthday spent without the family being together. God has the perfect moment planned when Joy will become our daughter and He saw fit that for his reasons that she still needed to be in China today. As much as I wish her to be home, I rest content in God's Sovereignty. There are times we must let go of our children and turn them over to the Lord, this wait is teaching me to do just that with Joy already, to release her to the her Saviour, knowing he has the best plan for her. She is my gift from him.

Happy Birthday Sweet Girl!

Birthday & Visa

Today the paperwork to process Joy's Visa to allow her to enter the U.S. is being dropped off at the American Embassy in China!!!! This is a 2 week process. After that we are just waiting for Travel Approval.

I miss her. How do you miss someone you haven't met? But I miss her. Her birthday is coming up next Thursday and we were able to have a birthday package sent to her. She will find out about us for what we think is the first time. The package includes a translated letter and a photo album with labels on the picture. I love the one that says 'HOME'. Something about seeing that word in HER photo album touched my heart.

Her orphanage was also sent money & agreed to buy a birthday cake & fruit for her class to share on her birthday and we hope to receive more pictures of her.

A moment of honesty....

Today I'm tired.

Our adoption expenses have increased yet again, another $200. Is $200 a big deal in the scheme of approximately $27,000? Probably not. But I'm feeling as if the invasive nature of this entire process has gotten to me today. I'm ready to have my daughter home, our privacy back, bureaucracy out of our lives and ready to just be a family of seven (7). I am tired today. I am a little cranky. And I'm ready for the end to arrive. Bare with me, it's just a temporary downside of the roller-coaster ride we've been on. I just needed to have a moment to stomp my feet, say 'it's not fair' and then be okay again tomorrow.

Ruth 1:9 says ...Then she kissed them goodbye and 'they wept aloud'

I guess sometimes we just need someone to weep with us. We don't always need to be picked up and put back together or corrected or even encouraged. Sometimes we just need a friend to weep with us and that is what makes all the difference.

Today I just want to weep. And I pray the Lord sends me someone who can "bare one anothers burdens".

I have thought about not posting this. Knowing that within the hour, or at least by tomorrow, I won't feel this way at all. But I have decided to post it because some day someone will read this. And that someone will need to know it's okay to have a sad moment, a bad moment and know that I have already weeped with you and prayed for you.

Stepping Forward...

Another Approval! After a day of Reflection.


My soul seems restless. ~ I would say my mind is restless which would be true but really it just feels like my entire being is restless. ~ Spring has sprung early, so we are itching to be free of schoolwork/housework and just relax in the breezes of the day. However, that never really happens but the idea of that just makes it hard to concentrate. We are so ready to be done with the WAITING PHASE of the adoption. I am eager every day to hear good news about progress. I check emails and recheck emails through out the day, hoping for news, any news that we have moved a little further along in the process.

Yesterday my Bible Study really spoke to my heart about my wait. Here are a few verses that reminded me WHO IS IN CHARGE HERE!


Isaiah 29:16 NIV ~ You turn things upside down, as if the potter were thought to be like the clay! Shall what is formed say to the one who formed it, "You did not make me"? Can the pot say to the potter, "You know nothing"? (Confession: Lord, you really do know the perfect time for all things here on Earth. You really are still on the throne. You really still are moving mountains that I don't even see, acting on my behalf when I don't even know it. Thank you Lord for all your behind the scenes work.)

Isaiah 30:15, 18 NIV ~ This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says: "In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it. Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; therefore he will rise up to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him! (Confession: I have not been resting nor quiet and that is why my strength is waning. I just have not spent much time talking to him lately. I read, study and move on. I have not been quiet with him in a few weeks.)

Exodus 23:20 NIV ~ "See, I am sending an angel ahead of you to guard you along the way and to bring you to the place I have prepared." (This verse was sent to me by our first adoption agency in our first adoption. What a nice reminder it was to see yesterday. In all our waiting, in all our preparations coupled with more waiting, the Lord is heavy at work and sending angels ahead of us and he is preparing the way. Thank you, Lord! Thank you! Without you NONE of this would be possible.)

And after a beautiful day of reflection, on March 15th, God was indeed at work behind the scenes. Little did I know our approval from the National Visa Center was processed that day. We received the good news today, the 16th. The cable/email went to the U.S. Embassy in Guangzhou China today. The liaison for our adoption agency will be filing Joy's Visa Application with at the Embassy next week. Our part is done. We are now finished with all paperwork and waiting on Visa Approval. It's a 2 week process and then we wait just one more short wait for Travel Approval.

The clock is ticking and it's not a New York Minute. It's not a Mexican Minute. It's a God Moment. He is and has prepared the way for our waiting sweetie to come home. And in His perfectness, I will rest.





~~And as a side note, I really did feel at peace today but not until after a sort of frustrating moment. A little "blurp" happened where our approval had the wrong spelling of Joy's Chinese name and our agency was closing early and not going to get our file to China today. It's been delayed until next week. But then I got an email from my mother. The email was just to tell me that the she was able to secure the cabin we always go to for Thanksgiving. I sighed a sigh of relief because I realized in that moment that I won't be going to the cabin without Joy. She may arrive a week early or four weeks late, but she won't be in China forever and soon, very soon, she will be here and our family will be complete.~~

Immigration Papers Approved!

We're in the homestretch now.....

Our i800 Application for Joy to Immigrate and be considered an immediate relative (and immediate citizen) has been approved!


Just a few more steps to go....!

Our approval has now been sent to the notorious *middle man* known as the National Visa Center, which simply emails that approval to the US Embassy in China. The approval should arrive at the Embassy by next Friday, the 16th. ~At that time the Embassy will take about 2 weeks to process our visa application for Joy. ~ And finally 7-14 days after we have visa approval, China will send us an invitation to travel known as TA.

Traveling in May is on the horizon!!!

A little more waiting,

....on the US Government.

We have sent in the application to USCIS (Homeland Security) to qualify Joy as an immediate relative of ours when she lands in the US. This will make her an immediate US Citizen. This process takes about 15-20 days.

We are on Day 10 and not so patiently waiting anymore.

I'm anxious.

I'm not so anxious that I'm in a bad mood. I'm excited anxious. I'm ready.

Pray with us that we fall within the "normal" processing range this time around and not the LONG WAIT we've had with every other phase of this adoption.



~ (3/5 update: just an update to my prayer request about having a normal processing time. Would you believe we ran into yet another delay!?! This time it was MY fault! I forgot to sign the stinkin' i800 application and on day 15 of waiting, received it back in the mail to sign and return. So our new countdown begins from 2/28/2012 (the 2nd date that USCIS received our application). I can't even tell you how mad I was at myself. God in all his glory really does have this under control even though my humanness does not see the method to this madness of delays yet. There is a plan. I believe that with all my heart. ~ We are on our new day 7 of waiting and hoping that our approval arrives by 3/13)

Goods news from a distant land!

Like cold water to a weary soul is good news from a distant land.
Proverbs 25:25

After 68 days.....we have.....

Glor-glor-glorious news!!!! Our adoption agency received our Final Approval from China today. (It's called a Letter Seeking Confirmation, which is a document with Joy's information on it and we "check" the "yes" box that we want her, sign it and send it back.)

Now...
We start processing the Immigration papers with the US government getting permission for Joy to enter the country...

After that....
The approval from China and the US immigrations are sent to the US Consulate in China, which starts processing a visa for Joy...

Then...
The Consulate lets the Chinese government know they are ready to process Joy's visa....

And Finally....
The Chinese government invites us to come to China to complete the adoption.

The entire above process take about 8 weeks. SO, in about 8 weeks we will be setting our travel dates. We will not travel in 8 weeks but we will start planning the dates and things will start to firm up here pretty soon.

Restless

I am Restless.

Restless from Anticipation.

Restless with the Hope.



I move around a lot. I try to sit but my mind can't focus on any one thing. I move around more. I can focus on little projects but not big ones. My mind wonders from one thing to the next without finishing the previous thought. I have lots of little to-do's each day that I forget all about.

It's a good thing.

Really.

It means we are expecting news of our sweet Joy.

It means the time is getting closer.

It means I am getting excited.

Restless.

This is the best restless I know of. Let me relish in it for just a while.

~ Day 63 of waiting on our formal referral (average wait 42-72 days) ~

49 days & happily waiting

Today is 49 days since our dossier was logged in. LOA's (Letter of Approval) have come in this time frame. Which makes me so excited to be so close. At maximum we should just have another 2 to 3 weeks.

It's exciting!

China is closed next week for Chinese New Year but I sure hope to be emailing & posting good news the week after that!

Keep praying for quick processing but most important 'God's Timing!' - I am so blessed to serve SUCH an awesome God who would choose ME (of all people!) to be the mom to our 4 children and then again he chooses me to be Joy's mom!!!! ME???!! The woman who wanted 1 child & a career?! Me?! He is an awesome God.



Waiting....

All I want for Christmas....

Christmas is here. I love Christmas. Most folks do. I love presents. I love making my wish list months in advance. I love the anticipation of the gifs I'll receive. I love opening my gifts and seeing which ones from my wish list made it under the tree.

But not this year.

As I shop for others, I'm not inclined at all to wish for myself.

I've lost that desire to have a material possession under my tree this year.

All I want for Christmas is JOY.

The 'joy' that comes from the Lord.

Both the 'spiritual joy'


....and....

the Living-breathing-gonna-be-my-daughter-JOY!



I am so glad the Lord is bringing this JOY into our life. So thrilled she will change our lives. So happy that we are coming down to our last few months of waiting. So elated that 2012 will see her home.

Merry Christmas. Happy New Year.

and

May the JOY of the Lord be your Strength this year.

Happily Waiting on LID

LID = Log In Date

This is the date that China takes our dossier off the stack on someones desk and "logs" it into their computer system. That date is so very important. Because then they start processing our adoption. :-) That's a happy-happy day. I really feel like our LID will be this week. We won't hear from China or our agency for several more weeks but when we do hear from them, the dossier usually has already been logged in for about 3 weeks. It just takes that long to hear back from them. So this should be the week. I'm excited.

After the LID, then we wait about 45-60 days (or so) to get the Formal Referral of Ms. Joy. How very exciting!!!

It's all really happening.

She's really coming home in a few months.

Happy-happy!

The dossier has arrived

After much mad-dashing, between us and our agency, our Dossier was mailed to China on 11/22 and arrived in the hands of the Chinese government on 11/28/2011.

So what's next?
We wait for a Log in Date (LID). This is when they remove our dossier from a stack and log it into their system and begin processing it. From the date it arrived (11/28) it takes about 10 days for it to get logged in. We are looking at a LID of about 12/10. But we won't hear what that log in date is until probably the end of December.

After that?
We wait about 45-75 days to receive a Letter Seeking Confirmation from the Chinese government. That letter is our formal referral that China sends to us saying "Hey, there is little girl Gua Er Guo, and here is her picture, would you like to adopt her?" And we say "Uh, yeah!!!!" and send it back.

Then?
We wait again. Another 2 months. For TA (travel approval). TA is our formal invite to come to China, then we get to set an appt with the American Consulate, get our travel visas and airline tickets. All that takes about a 4 to 6 weeks.

Then?
We are OFF to China to get our baby girl.

This wait is exciting! And it's frustrating because you want everything to happen yesterday. But we know that God has the moment ordained that Joy will become a Clark and we anxiously look forward to that date.

A Promise is A Promise

The Lord is the same yesterday, today and forever. Man will fail us. Man will break his promises but God never will. And God promised me a child. He promised me Joy. So why do I fret?

It's day 76 of what we had been traditionally a 50 day wait for the Homeland Security (USCIS) clearance. Why us? Why did God choose us for this long wait? Why now when it was our turn to receive the approval? Why? Why? and more why?

Bottom line: I don't know. I may never know. And in all my worrying to make it happen yesterday, my worry does not accomplish one single thing of good.

God promised me Joy. Worry only makes us sick and doesn't accomplish anything. God keeps his promises. God has an appointed time that will not be missed.

And, so each day I try harder and harder to release my worry, my stomach knots over to Him.

You may not be an adoptive parent and wonder why 25 days is a big deal. Let me just say if you were pregnant and 25 days beyond your due date, you would have been induced. And friends, I am READY to be induced here!!!

I wish I could say I have fully handed it over. That would be a lie but I am leaning on the Everlasting Rock. I am pulling my strength from him. I know he will fulfill his promises. I know he will make my joy complete. I know she will be in my arms. I know that our family will be all together on one continent. I know these things. Let me focus on what I know and stop fretting over what only God knows.

Joy Comes in the Morning

Psalm 30:5b
Weeping may last through the night,
but JOY comes with the morning.


I have been weeping and waiting for updates on my girl. My soul has longed to see her face. As I sat outside at 7am this morning my longing went into overload and I had a sense that I might have an update on her. I rushed inside the house to find these sweet photos gracing my computer screen.






Thanking Jesus for this glimpse at my sweet girl. Just a few more months and the wait will be over.

~Photos taken July 2011~

Freedom

Just thinking about our Joy on this Independence Day.
As she travels home she will gain various types of freedom.


Freedom to medical care.

Freedom to education.

Freedom of religion.

Freedom to vote.

Freedom to be.

Freedom.

Next 4th of July, she will be here. Her life, our life will be merged and we will be a family.

I miss her this day, terribly.

Update for June

We had the last meeting with our social worker on June 29th. We do not have all our clearances in yet but they should trickle in over the next week or two. The agency said even though we had our last meeting, it could take another 5 weeks to have a completed homestudy in hand. 5 weeks? Wow! That's quite a long time, really. But I am remembering God's timing is perfect. I will do what I can to hurry my part along and wait patiently (or - if I'm honest- not so patiently) on the Lord for the rest.

We had a few fun fundraisers in June. We now have $3,300 of the needed $10,000. Just $6,600 to go. Just! Well, that word "just" is an operative word that feels good some days and other days feels overwhelming.

We are hoping to raise more funds in July with our PUZZLE fundraiser.


We are also offering a $25 Target gift card raffle to ANYONE who donates ANY AMOUNT in the month of July. The raffle will take place on August 1st.

July is a hard month to raise funds. Families have costly vacations, kids have costly camps. Funds are low for everyone. But we are trusting on God to bring our Joy from the East as only He could promise.



We are also hoping that July will bring us updated pictures of Ms. Joy. The photos we have of her are from 2008. Quite a long time ago, aye? That's not sitting so well with my waiting-mommy-heart.

Well, I was going to use this blog only when we travel. But, I have found out I need an outlet for my heart. A place to write when I don't have anyone to talk to. When Facebook just is not fun anymore and well, honestly, I think my Facebook friends are sick of hearing from me. Awe, it's a mom-in-waiting. What is she to do? Not many understand. But those who have Been-There-Done-That do really get it. They get the wait is tough. They get that a waiting mom's heart is broken every second of every day. They just get it. And I am blessed that my Church Family seems so far to have "gotten it" too. They have embraced our Joy in a way that very few people have in the past. I am blessed by my Church, just totally blessed.

Just 3 words to say today....